Spleen Jul-Dec 2004 archive

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Baghdad Burning
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Flight 77
The Pentagon was not hit by an airliner on 11/9.
Click here to read more.

Sadman Hussein
Old news. Bogey Man captured by Superpowerman

The US has used napalm in Fallujah
Read about it here

Clueless old git to tap dance at Nuremburg Bowl
Today a clueless old git agreed to put on his dancing fool shoes and tap dance at a rally of some of the world's most vicious, brainless thugs.

Sir Macker was chosen ahead of much younger nipples to perform at the fascist bonding session in January.

Once upon a time Sir McObsequious turned down a gong because of a war but is now glad to warm up for the stormtroopers of the New Order.

More recently he declared before he knew what he was saying that custard bombs used by the coalition in Iraq were "a custardly weapon."

Now he is to entertain the National Union of Custard Bomb Throwers at their annual Super Custard Bowl gladatorial games and bloodlust convention.

Asked for comment, he told us, "I am dead chuffed as I have not a clue what I am doing."

Nov 22, '04

While I am sitting here playing with lemmings, some people are doing truly useful work.

The blog called Truth Diamond is a remarkable exercise in collecting information about the real agenda behind the fake War on Terror and the way certain corporations and governments are beating the world into their own image. Click here to read Truth Diamond.

There is more information at: http://www.911truth.org/

Karl Schwarz has close knowledge of the Bush regime and much of what is happening on Capitol Hill because he used to work with those guys. You can learn about his interpretation of events here: http://www.karlschwarz.com/

And more ... Blood and oil in the Caspian: http://www.newgreatgame.com/

Following the US general election, here's a picture of a lemming.

Lots of white space here. What shall we fill it with? — Ed.

Lookalike

Davros ... and McMakka

On the day that Makka is chosen to perform at the Superbowl, can it be a coincidence that we discover he has an uncanny resemblence to Davros, creator of the Daleks?

Do we need to be told?

Nov. 22, '04

Censorship
Interesting tidbit.
Front page of the BBC online today (just before US election day) news that the tours of duty of thousands of US soldiers in Iraq are to be extended. This is a potential vote loser for Bush on the day before the election.
A quick survey of CNN, Fox, USA Today, NYT, and the Washington Post ... none of them mention it in any prominent place.
Update: now CBC is running the story of the tour extensions. Interesting to note that these soldiers will already have voted and that George bin Dubya has moved the goal posts.

Nov.2, 2004

Osama bin Laden endorses Bush
Bin Laden's sudden manifestation on the nation's airwaves seems to have done Bush a lot of good.

Polls today show that undecided voters are inclining to Bush.

This could mean that Bush, if he wins, will be able to say he is the first and only president to be put into power because of the word of an evildoer.

He will be able to add this accolade to all his others — the first president to not be elected to office, for example.

Meanwhile Tom Ridge has expressed confidence that ObL will not attack on election day. Why is he so confident? Is it because he is pulling ObL's strings?

Oct. 31, 2004

Satan appears to US voters
Today, Satan dramatically appeared to US voters threatening them with a great smiting.

'I shall smite you a lot,' he said. 'And then I will smite you some more. Just see if I don't,' he added.

The Horned One's sudden appearance on America's TV screens came just milliseconds before the US general erection.

'And I am not just threatening to smite you to scare you into voting for George,' Lucifer was careful to point out. 'Even though our dads are chums'.

Evil Incarnate looked dapper and relaxed as he told viewers, 'And no, there's nothing the least bit odd about me popping up on prime time just before the election to deliver a scary message.This just happens to be my day for popping up with a scary message.'

As for his reasons for smiting lots of Americans, he was not specific. 'It is not because I hate freedom. In fact I have lots of freedom because no one has managed to catch me, and I rather enjoy it. Actually, I am going to smite you, er ... for the usual reasons. You know. Whatever the reason was last time. Because Dick and Carl asked me to.

'So, you can vote for anyone you like, but woe betide you if you get it wrong, because the smiting will be truly awful. Just see if it isn't.'

October 29, 2004

Nothing new on Psipook
A team of experts has established that nothing new has been posted on Psipook since October 16, 1771.

"Nothing new has been posted on Psipook since October 16, 1771", said a UN expert inspector person.

"This is because nothing new has been posted on Psipook since October 16, 1771", explained Psipook supremo Psilocybe P Pook.

A man in the street observed that nothing new has been posted on Psipook since October 16, 177, and added, "Not that I give a tinker's."

Ocotover 24, 20000004, World Hangover Day

Happy bithrday for yesterday, Willll.

Witless in Gaza
The Israeli army has just withdrawn from Gaza after a 16 day operation that has left a hundred Palestinians dead — many of them civilians — and which has destroyed thousands of homes.

At the same time, an Israeli officer accused of firing repeatedly into the corpse of a Palestinian girl has been cleared by the army of 'unethical conduct'.

He remains suspended from duty because of problems getting along with colleagues.

October 16, 2004

A database of Iraqi civilian casualties (click). Names to faces ... I hope the supporters of the war feel proud of themselves.And just another quick reminder for those of you who haven't got it yet: no WMD, no al Qaida. Just what did all these people die for? And hands up all those who are going to vote Bush or Blair in the upcoming elections. Hands up all those who think they should be banged up for crimes against humanity ... for that database, click here.

June 25, 2004

Bush Permitted 9/ll
With that election coming, now is a good time to remember that Bush and his crew deliberately permitted the September 11 attacks to happen in order to kick start a new aggressive foreign policy.

We link here to an article by Michael Meacher, a British politician and former member of the Blair cabinet who has joined some of the dots regarding Bush's deed.

Tessa Hewitt apologises for Iraq intelligence errors
Blair concedes there may have been no Iraqi WMDs, US inspectors confirm same

So those tens of thousands of people died by mistake. Well, that's all right then, at least there was nothing malicious in the killing.

And, thankfully, the oil is safe.

Wrong intelligence

No intelligence

Oct. 08, 2004

Man who used to play banjo brings terror to America
A flight to the US was diverted in a security alert when crew realised one passenger was a man who used to play banjo.

Fighter jets escorted the plane from US airspace to Canada where it could blow up or do anything, because it was Canada not America.

Frightened and bemused passengers and crew reported: “It was definitely a man that used to play the banjo. He had a beard and everything.”

A spokesman for the US Dept. of Homeland Insecurity, speaking on condition of anonymity because he did not know his own name, told reporters, “It was a really serious situation because he has a beard and he definitely used to play the banjo. If he had had the banjo with him at the time we would have had to shoot the plane down.”

US President George Bush commented, “That we had to divert this individual to Canada just shows how dangerous these ex-banjo players are. This shows the world how seriously they have to take us. Now just watch me pee straight.”

Oct. 3, 2004

Samarra Doublethink
Today, US forces are storming Samarra in Iraq. As usual they claim to be killing only Iraqi fighters while the hospitals fill up with dead and injured women and children. So far so normal.

What is interesting about this new campaign is the military spokesman coming up with a new instance of calling black white and vice versa.

According to the BBC, the US military said the offensive was in response to what it called "repeated and unprovoked attacks by anti-Iraqi forces" and went on to explain that the assault aimed "to facilitate orderly government processes, kill or capture anti-Iraqi forces, and set the conditions to proceed with infrastructure and quality of life improvements for the people of Samarra".

So the Iraqi resistance to foreign occupation is "anti-Iraqi". How did they figure that one out?

Well, they know well enough what the real situation is, but by twisting language, they hope to obscure the truth.

Well, try this out. If the Iraqi resistance to foreign invasion is anti-Iraqi, then the invading US military must be anti-American.

So the anti-Iraqi forces must be pro-American, and the Americans, being anti-American must be pro-Saddam, pro-al Zarqawi and pro-al Sadr, and Mr. Bush has made it quite clear that if you ain't for us you are against us, so the Iraqi militias are in fact doing the will of the White House in ridding the planet of terrorists.

It's all clear now.

October 1, 2004

Shoot the neighbours
This morning I had a pair of sick-world revelations.  
I was reading an online BBC report about how Clinton’s ban on the purchase of assault weapons is about to be repealed.

Lawnmower

That was sick world feeling number one.

Sick world feeling number two: the BBC, to help its non gun-toting readers along, listed three typical assault weapons — the AK47, the Uzi and something called an AR15, which was described as a civilian version of the military M16.

A civilian version of an M16?

What civilian application can there be of a weapon that fires 1000 rounds per minute, is deadly at ranges over a kilometre and whose bullets can penetrate house walls?

AR15 Assault rifle

You can imagine the scene in American suburbs. The sun is shining, the butterflies are flapping in the garden. Hubby tells wife,"Hey, hon, I'm hefting my
AR15 so I’m just out to cut the grass. And then I’m going to shoot it. And then I’m going to shoot the flowers a while."

"OK, hon. I’ll be right here in the kitchen with my Uzi shooting the washing up."

"Then maybe later I'll put up that book shelf in the den."

"Make sure you shoot it after. You know you sometimes forget."

"Hey, how about we get the neighbours round tonight for a cook out?"

"And then we can have a nice shoot out together. Sounds blissy."

"Say, did you feed the dog?"

"No, but I did shoot it."

"Well, that should keep him happy a while."

Guns don't kill people. Idiots with guns kill people.

September 14, 2004

Startling Headline
Gripping story.

Dry aside: thank God the Olympics are over for another four years.

Spooky graphic.

Fear of cancer.

Hilarious conclusion.

Complete failure of imagination.

September 2004

Why does America suddenly care about Sudan?
George Bush's sudden compassion for the Darfur refugees may be a means of getting at Sudan's resources. Story by Psipook's Chris Page in the London News Review

August 2004

A Modest Proposal
Following the murder of yet another hostage in Iraq, Psilocybe P Pook (No Relation) has hit on a wizard wheeze to hasten the end of the US occupation he has been railing against for so long.

The plan is to recruit hordes of hostages direct from Europe and the United States.
They will be shipped directly to the Iraqi resistance for immediate decapitation.

We will take anyone, but family people, the young and the crippled or vulnerable will be preferred. Each will be supplied with an ultra-sharp halal blade for use in decapitation to save the resistance getting sore arms sharpening knives.

As the dead hostages pile up, the Western governments and people — especially the people who opposed the war — will see quite clearly how civilised are the folk resisting the occupation, and how deserving they are of our support. No doubt the Marines will hang their heads in shame, acknowledging the moral superiority of their foes and go home and George Bush will retire to a hermitage to figure out where he went wrong.

August 2004

Land of the brave and the free tits
While Iraqis are fighting for their country, US forces are fighting for breast enlargements. Benefits to veterans and the poor are being cut but, the US army's fighting men and women are offered free cosmetic surgery. Read the story here — will open in a new window.

Thanks to Jerry Gordon for forwarding this to me.

August 2004

Japan's slow rush to war
The very nation that wrote Japan's pacifist constitution is pushing the country to abandon its principles and support US military ambitions around the globe. The Japanese public as a whole is firmly against militarism, but when powerful forces seek change, the Japanese may not get a choice. This a story of cynical realpolitik

Article by Michael Penn, The University of Kitakyushu, as posted on Doug Carmichael's Roughcut. Click here to see the story in a new window.

More thanks to Jerry Gordon for pointing this story out.
August 2004

US Govt. is set to reinstate the draft
American kids may be forced to join the imperial legions through bills waiting to be presented to Congress.

Read about it here.

Why tyrants rule Arabs
For 60 years, the West has propped up Arab despots, creating poverty and illiteracy where education once thrived
GWYNNE DYER
Read the article here. It will open in a new window.
July 24, 2004

A banjo

Suffer yet more little children ...
The first casualties of war are the innocents

Hollywood Freaks
War doesn't come to the Oscars

Flight 77
The Pentagon was not hit by an airliner on 11/9

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