Coalition update
Q: What does Nick Clegg stand for? A: David Cameron entering the room. Update supplied by Nagaijin
Pat Robertson in deal with devil
It has been revealed that US televangelist Pat Robertson is cursed by a secret deal with the Devil. In return for unlimited power, riches and cable access, Robertson gave away…
Japan weather god wanted for crimes against humanity
The Japanese Shinto god of weather is wanted for crimes against humanity. The International Court of Human Rights in The Hague has issued a warrant for his arrest. The Japanese…
Organ donated to il Presidente
The story about the war wound was just a ruse to hide the horrific truth: Spanish dictator General Franco donated one of his testicles to provide a brain for the…
Bush gives head to hecklers
George Bush’s address at a July 4 event was interrupted by hecklers denouncing his occupation of foreign countries. As the hecklers were dragged away one by one by security personnel,…
Imperial dudgeon
My human rights have been violated, and those of thousands like me. This week the EU caved into pressure from British imperialists and excused the UK from going properly metric.…
Drug crisis hits UK
British politics was thrown into turmoil today when it emerged that absolutely no one in the country has never taken drugs. The revelation rules out the entire population from leading…
Nostradamus predicts World Cup results
Sixteenth century French mystic Nostradamus was well known to be a football fan. Recent research has revealed that he has predicted the results of the 2006 World Cup, right down…
Liar B
I just noticed that Blair is an anagram of Liar B. Which suggests a retailer of second-rate porky pies. ‘Blair’ is not an actual anagram of ‘war criminal’ but it…
US terror plot revealed
George Bush has revealed how he and the neocons have hijacked the USA and are looking for a tall building to fly it into.