Sun. Jul 14th, 2024

While popsters around the world are lining up to urge us to environmental action with the Live Earth concerts, cuter-than-kittens J-Pop boy band Arashi are doing their best to destroy the world.

To promote their new album, whatever the hell it’s called, they have employed a large lorry emlazoned with billboard-sized ads to drive around central Osaka, thus dumping yet more carbon into the atmosphere for no good purpose.

At the close of business each day, you can see this lorry parked out the back of OCAT. It looks imported, probably American and is all gleaming chrome and classic retro bodywork.

Arashi are not listed among the acts appearing at either the Tokyo or Kyoto Live Earth shows.

On the subject of Live Earth, some sceptics have dared to suggest that popsters flying around the world (British acts appearing in the US, US acts appearing in Britain, a 50 per cent foreign bill in Tokyo, and so on) to perform with lots of power hungry sound systems and lights might be sending a confusing message. One cause of consternation is the inclusion of The Police on the US bill — Sting contributes tonnes of CO2 to the atmosphere every time he opens his gob.

Arashi, of course, means ‘storm’ — which reminds us of the tornado that killed nine people in Japan in November 2006, and the like of which is going to be more common because of the effects of global warming encouraged by people like, er, Arashi.

By chris page

Magazine editor, writer of fiction and non-fiction; exile; cat person; red wine for blood and cheese in his soul. Chris Page is the author of the novels Weed, Sanctioned, Another Perfect Day in ****ing Paradise, King of the Undies World, and The Underpants Tree. He is also a freelance journalist, copywriter, editor, cartoonist, illustrator, graphic designer, and consultant in the use and abuse of false moustaches (don’t wear them — you’re welcome — the invoice is in the mail).

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