Sun. Jul 14th, 2024

There’s a new farce in town and it’s hilarious

The story so far: as a result of an internal squabble, the government of Britain calls a vote to decide whether to leave the biggest, most affluent trading bloc in the world. This triggers the most divisive and rancorous campaign anyone can remember. Both sides try to outdo each other in telling outrageous lies. Nationalism and racism stain the air. A woman is murdered. In a painfully close vote the nation chooses to leave the trading bloc. The prime minister resigns but refuses to trigger the legal process that will actually take the UK out of the trading bloc, whose top dogs are now telling us to hurry up and piss off. The media reports that large numbers of people now regret their vote, didn’t know it would actually be counted, thought they were protesting at something but didn’t really know what, and even ask if they can change their mind. Google reports that the top five search terms in the UK in the day after the vote were all questions about what the EU actually was, suggesting that millions of people had voted without knowing what they were voting for. Three million people sign a petition demanding to have the exact same vote they just had.

Nationwide, there is a spike in racist incidents. It turns out that the referendum wasn’t legally binding anyway, and since the police are investigating the ruling party for electoral fraud in the general election, the legitimacy of the government and the referendum are in doubt. Politicians run around looking for a way to back peddle or just pretend the whole thing didn’t even happen, while the leaders of the victorious leave campaign back peddle on their promises on funding the NHS and on immigration. The same clique claim they would negotiate a deal with the EU that would give the UK the same benefits and terms of membership without actually being members, and a flock of pigs were seen fluttering overhead. The opposition party gangs up on its leader and attempts an internal coup. Scotland insists on another vote for independence, pretty much guaranteeing the break up of the UK.
Oh, yes, high farce in the best British traditions of Ealing comedy and as surreal as Monty Python. I can’t wait to see what happens next but, for sure, this one is set to run and run.

By chris page

Magazine editor, writer of fiction and non-fiction; exile; cat person; red wine for blood and cheese in his soul. Chris Page is the author of the novels Weed, Sanctioned, Another Perfect Day in ****ing Paradise, King of the Undies World, and The Underpants Tree. He is also a freelance journalist, copywriter, editor, cartoonist, illustrator, graphic designer, and consultant in the use and abuse of false moustaches (don’t wear them — you’re welcome — the invoice is in the mail).

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